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Big Sister Jess and Little Sister Sky

Big Sister Jess and Little Sister Sky

From a young age, Sky felt her life spinning out of control. She grew up in a home with drug use and physical abuse, witnessed her house raided by police, and, at one point, was physically abused herself. She knew that she couldn’t live there anymore.

She moved in with a friend before finding a stable guardian in a different part of town. She found even more stability when she was matched with her Big Sister Jess through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Southern Minnesota.

They didn’t have the typical journey to becoming a match. When Sky moved and enrolled at a new school, she was struggling in her personal life and academically. Her new guidance counselor was worried about her reaching her full potential and expressed concern to his wife, Jess.

“There is one certainty in this plan–I will be there to support her every step of the way.”

– Big Sister Jess

“[He] came home and said, ‘Jess, do you know a Sky that went to Washington a couple of years ago?’” Jess says. “I said, ‘Oh my gosh, I probably talked about her every day. Why?’”

Jess’s husband explained that Sky was a new student at his school. He wondered if reconnecting the two of them might be good for Sky. Jess expressed interest, so he checked in with Sky to see how she felt.

Sky was more than up for it. Jess had been her fifth-grade teacher, and Sky vividly remembered the first time they met — she was in third grade, and she had fallen down the stairs. Jess remembers it too.

“I happened to be walking in the hall when several little girls breathlessly told me Sky fell and was hurt,” Jess says. “I scooped her into my arms and brought her down to the nurse.”

From that moment on, Jess kept an eye on Sky.

“I noticed she would go out of her way to acknowledge me,” Sky says. “She was persistent in making sure I knew she cared. I didn’t always make it easy for her, but she never gave up on me, and that’s what I remembered about her.”

When the two reconnected in Sky’s middle school years, Jess knew she wanted to help her get through this tough time. She also knew she couldn’t do it all alone, though. She wanted the relationship to be supported and have set boundaries, and she thought Big Brothers Big Sisters would provide the perfect support system for them.

“I called Big Brothers Big Sisters and explained the situation, asking if it was a possibility for us to be matched,” Jess says. “Although they told me they couldn’t guarantee it, I had a peaceful feeling that all would work out as it should.”

After the vetting process and background checks, Jess and Sky were officially matched as Big and Little Sisters. Since then, Sky has grown both personally and academically. She says she has Jess to thank for her growth.

“She was there for me when I was down and at my lowest and she’ll be there when I’m up,” Sky says. “If I didn’t have that consistent reminder, I would probably have given up a long time ago and gone down the same road as my mom.”

At the age of 2, Little Brother Baylee lost his eyesight. As he grew up, his mother wanted a mentor for him because his dad wasn’t involved in his life, but she wasn’t sure if there would be a Big Brother who would be willing to be matched with a Little who is blind. Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northeastern Wisconsin talked to Big Brother Al, and he didn’t balk at being matched with a blind Little Brother. They have been now been matched for nearly eight years.

“From the moment [our match support specialist] introduced us, we both knew we were the perfect match for each other,” Al says.

Baylee has always been bright, thoughtful, and sensitive, but since being matched with Al, he’s become a drummer, a fisherman, and a student scoring in the 93rd percentile of the ACT. Some of his favorite memories with Al have been fishing at the Wildlife Sanctuary, discussing his big future plans, and having dinner together.

“I can talk to him about anything I need to, and he’ll provide candid, wise advice, and he’ll help me solve my problem.”

– Little Brother Baylee

“Since Al came into Baylee’s life so many years ago, he has helped Baylee grow as a person, a friend, and a fine young man,” Baylee’s mom says.

Baylee also gives credit to Al for helping him accomplish many of his goals — some of which have to do with his disability — learning to use his cane more proficiently, getting a seeing-eye dog — and some of which are common to all teens — like figuring out where to go to college and how to apply for scholarships.

“He’s taught me if I want to take off in the world, be a writer, be an author, a husband and a father sometime in the future, that I need to work for it: practice my writing, work with people,” Baylee says. “He’s taught me to work my hardest to achieve the most.”

Al wasn’t the only one teaching. Baylee also taught Al a lot, like often how a person like him sees the world. When Baylee watches movies, he listens to a descriptive audio track that explains what’s happening on screen. When he’s playing video games, like Wii Baseball, he listens closely to the sound to know when to swing. Al doesn’t let him win.

“Baylee consistently hit homeruns,” Al says. “I would throw a pitch, Baylee would swing the remote paddle, the sound of bat hitting the ball, and Baylee would say, ‘That was a homerun, wasn’t it?’”

In the game, after the ball is pitched and as the ball approaches home plate, the sound changes. Baylee listens for that and times his swing perfectly. Al says these interactions have taught him a lot, and he admits that Baylee always beats him.

“I have learned so much from Baylee,” Al says. “Probably more than Baylee will ever learn from me.”

Baylee might debate Al on that, but there’s no denying that Al, Baylee’s mom, and Baylee have worked together to help Baylee reach his potential.

Big Sister Marilyn and Little Sister Starr

Big Sister Marilyn and Little Sister Starr

When Big Sister Marilyn met her Little Sister Starr, she asked her a list of questions to get better acquainted.

“When’s your birthday?” Marilyn asked.

“In September,” Starr said shyly. Marilyn asked what day. Five-year-old Starr held up one little finger for September 1.

“Chills started running down my spine, and I started getting very excited and had her grandmother confirm that Starr’s birthday was actually September 1,” Marilyn says. “Of course, Starr’s grandmother is looking at me with some confusion until I shared that September 1 is my birthday too.”

They shared the same birthday and were set to share many memories together. In their 12 years of being matched, they have spent time feeding ducks at a lake, visiting museums, and celebrating every birthday, usually over Thai food.

Their dedication to Thai food came after Marilyn made a goal to expand Starr’s taste in food. She was tired of only seeing Starr eat pizza, hot dogs and chicken nuggets and began taking her to a variety of new restaurants to try new food. It was then Starr discovered her new favorite.

“I was a picky eater, and Marilyn has helped me overcome that,” she says. “Now my favorite food is Thai with Pad Thai being my favorite dish.”

“I cannot imagine life without her or what my life would have been without her.”

– Little Sister Starr

When Little Sister Starr was first matched through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Illinois, she was just 5 years old. Her grandmother and mother were raising her, and her mom struggled with health and addiction issues. It would have been easy for Starr to grow up with a limited view of what was possible for her. But spending time with Marilyn, helped her see that the world before her is big and there are so many experiences available to her.

“I have looked at Marilyn’s house and thought, ‘I can have a house like this,’” Starr says. “I can have a bedroom like this. I don’t have to live in public housing anymore.”

Starr sees so many possibilities for herself. As she prepares for college, she knows Marilyn will continue to be there and help her reach her full potential.

“Marilyn is the reason that Starr is motivated to find a better life,” Starr’s mm says. “Her grandma and I had Starr’s past, but Marilyn showed Starr what her future could look like.”


UPDATE: Little Sister Starr has taken big steps toward realizing her potential: she is currently attending community college with the plan to save money and prepare to attend a four-year college in the future, and she is working part-time at a local bank.

Big Brother Andrew and Little Brother Javier

Big Brother Andrew and Little Brother Javier

When Hurricane Harvey was barreling toward Houston, Big Brother Andrew called his Little Brother Javier’s mom to make sure they had the supplies they needed. A single mom working constantly to make ends meet, she hadn’t yet had a chance to go to the store to stock up on food, bottles of water, or packs of batteries.

“I still remember when I got home from work and looked at the food and the necessary things that Andrew had brought us,” Javier’s mom says. “I wanted to cry because only a good-hearted person does that for other people and that person is Andrew.”

The action was just another on the long list of times Andrew has been there for Javier and his family, and it came as no surprise to Javier.

“Ever since day one, I knew that he would always be there when I needed him,” Javier says.

“I hope I can follow in Andrew’s footsteps and become a Big Brother in the future.”

– Little Brother Javier

The wheels of their match began turning four years ago, when Javier came home from school with some information about Big Brothers Big Sisters.

“He told me a bit about the program, and I hesitated and told him I wasn’t sure it was a good idea, but Javier insisted that he was interested,” Javier’s mom says. “He said that it was a good opportunity for him because he was going to have a Big Brother with whom he could spend time and go places.”

The idea of “going places” interested Javier, and his mom noticed. Because she was working all the time and couldn’t take Javier to all the places he wanted to go, she signed him up. He was matched with Andrew, and Javier’s mom saw the benefits right away.

Andrew and Javier did everything together from rock out at a Luke Bryan concert to eat “Big-Tex” burgers at the fair. Javier finally had a person to go places with, but he also had more than that in Andrew.

He had someone who would help him step outside of his comfort zone. Someone who would always be there for him.

One of his favorite memories was the time they spoke at a Big Brothers Big Sister Lone Star gala. “Before the event, Andrew helped me get fitted into my first tuxedo and surprised me with a rented convertible so that we could ‘show up in style,’” Javier says. “I was nervous to speak in front of over 400 people, but having Andrew by my side made me feel safe and comfortable.”

During the speech, Javier made the crowd laugh and cheer. He received a standing ovation.

Whether he’s prepping Javier for public speaking or prepping his family for a hurricane, Andrew has epitomized what it means to be a Big Brother. But when he talks about his match, he only wants to praise Javier.

“Javier is a special young man who had a bright future ahead of him,” he says. “Over the past four years, I have witnessed an amazing transformation from a shy fourth-grader to an outgoing eighth-grader.”

Javier’s school attendance is consistently perfect. He always has straight A’s.  And with a Big Brother like Andrew who is always there for him, his future looks bright.

Big Sister Lindsay and Little Sister Amari

Big Sister Lindsay and Little Sister Amari

When Amari was young, her mother passed away unexpectedly from a pulmonary embolism. She and her older sister went to live with their grandmother, who knew that building new relationships with adults would be challenging but necessary for both girls. She signed them both up to be Littles with Rappahannock Big Brothers Big Sisters. Amari was matched with Big Sister Lindsay.

At the time, Lindsay had just finished her undergraduate degree and moved out of her parent’s home. She had a lot of free time on her hands.

“I wanted to do something meaningful,” Lindsay says. “I came across the Big Brothers Big Sisters organization through a Google search, and I was immediately intrigued.”

“I love watching her grow up and mold into a young woman who continues to amaze me.”

– Big Sister Lindsay

That intrigue turned into action, and Lindsay made the commitment to mentor Amari for at least a year. Within a week of being matched, she was attending Amari’s school spirit night at a local restaurant. Like many Littles, Amari was shy at first, but they connected quickly and began building their relationship one activity at a time.

“They soon realized that they enjoyed the same things, such as shopping, eating out, traveling, and getting pedicures and manicures,” Amari’s grandmother says.

Just as their match was blossoming and approaching the one-year mark, Lindsay got some big news – she would be starting a new job. The one catch was that she’d have to move two hours away. The last thing she wanted to do was end her relationship with Amari, who had already experienced so much loss and change in her life.

Faced with the decision of closing her match with Amari or seeing her less often, Lindsay talked through the options their Match Support Specialist, who recommended she talk with Amari’s grandmother.

“We discussed the fact that I wouldn’t be able to see Amari as much as I had been seeing her,” Lindsay says. “She said they were more than okay with it. They wanted to continue the relationship even though I was moving away.”

Lindsay and Amari stayed matched, and they ended up seeing each other about two times a month, even with Lindsay living two hours away. After spending a year away, Lindsay moved back to the same town as Amari, and they were able to pick up right where they’d left off.

“Lindsay is like a mother figure to me since my mother passed away,” Amari says. “I’ve learned so much from Lindsay—you could only imagine.”

Lindsay helped Amari transition from elementary school to middle school and now to high school. She’s now an honor roll student who excels at Spanish, plays multiple instruments in the Salvation Army band, and volunteers with her church. After getting past the hurdle of a year of distance, their match shows no sign of slowing down.

“I will continue this relationship with her throughout the rest of my life,” Lindsay says. “We just celebrated our seventh year together, and I’m looking forward to a lifetime of more.”

Big Brother Murray and Little Brother Jolen

Big Brother Murray and Little Brother Jolen

While Little Brother Jolen was waiting for three years to be matched with a Big Brother, his mom kept him engaged with Big Brothers Big Sisters Services in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, by taking him to agency events for “unmatched Littles.” She says she knew early on how important it would be for Jolen to have someone to look up to.

“Jolen was six years old when I decided to enroll him in Big Brothers Big Sisters Services,” Jolen’s mom says. “His father had been incarcerated since he was a baby, and I wanted him to have a network of positive men doing positive things.”

When Jolen was 9, he finally got his Big Brother. He was matched with Murray, who he calls “Mr. Miller” because his mom emphasizes manners.

Murray had worked for over 20 years with inmates at the local detention center, helping them earn their GEDs. He decided that instead of working with dozens of men and women at a time who had already gotten involved with the justice system, he wanted to focus his attention and energy on one young person. He wanted to intervene at a point in someone’s life when he could help make sure they never got onto the wrong path.

“This match requires me to lead by example and illustrate what it’s like to live as a productive African-American male in society.”

– Big Brother Murray

Big Brother Murray first bonded with Jolen over sports and then discovered that Jolen also liked visiting art museums. As a result of being matched with Murray, Jolen became open to new events and activities he hadn’t experienced before. “Jolen is a quiet but in-touch young man who is very cultured in life,” Murray says.

Murray’s role in Jolen’s life was tested when Jolen was in middle school. “Jolen had become a bit of a show-off,” Jolen’s mom says. “He’s a big boy, and tall, which made him popular. He’s also very silly and people even began to label him as a bully.”

Jolen’s mom reached out to Murray for help. He reassured her that Jolen was figuring out who he was, and that Jolen had time to get it right. Murray became Jolen’s voice of reason. When he started to give in to peer pressure, Murray would give Jolen alternatives.

“Watching Jolen grow up into who he is now, he’s not a young man who follows the crowd. He’s confident and sure of himself,” Jolen’s mom says.

The confidence shows up on the football field, too. Jolen is determined to play college football. He says he remembers vividly the first time he realized that playing college ball was a possibility for him. Big Brother Murray, Mr. Miller, had taken him to Wake Forest University for an event with Carolina Panthers linebacker Thomas Davis. They toured the stadium, and Jolen imagined himself playing in a stadium like that.

“After the tour, we had dinner and Thomas Davis talked about his story and how he made it to the NFL,” Jolen says. “That day, Mr. Miller helped me see that if Thomas Davis made it, then I can, too. I can do anything.”

Jolen really can. At the 2018 Big Brothers Big Sisters National Conference, he spoke in front of a crowd to introduce Mr. Miller to the world as the 2018 National Big Brother of the Year.

Left to Right: Big Brother Murray, BBBSA’s President and CEO, Pam Iorio, Comcast NBCUniversal’s VP of Procurement, Jennifer Yohe, Little Brother Jolen
Big Sister Myra and Little Sister Saleen

Big Sister Myra and Little Sister Saleen

The crowd at the 2018 BBBSA National Conference gave a standing ovation when the 2018 Big Sister of the Year, Myra, hugged her Little Sister Saleen on stage. Saleen had just introduced Myra to the attendees, and it was Myra’s turn to speak, but they couldn’t go on without a hug first. They both knew how far they had come to get to that moment.

Their story started when Saleen was 6 years old. She had recently lost her father. At school, her teacher knew she wasn’t coping well with the loss, so they referred her to Big Brothers Big Sisters of Broward County. She was matched with Myra, who became her Big Sister and began visiting her at school once a week. They felt instantly connected.

“I knew that Saleen had just lost her father, and I could only imagine how confused she must have felt,” Myra says.

Myra started noticing something troubling about then 6-year-old Saleen. Patches of her thick brown hair were missing. “She had a bald spot on the side of her head,” Myra says. “Even though Saleen was not vocal about the pain she felt, she displayed it in other ways.” She was pulling out her hair. Her eyebrows. Her eyelashes.

“If your day is bad, she always knows how to make you smile, no matter what.”

– Little Sister Saleen

Myra knew she needed to help her Little Sister, so she reached out to their Match Support Specialist. Together, they talked about how to support Saleen and give her tools to cope with her grief. Myra decided to bring supplies to Saleen’s school and help her make a memory book about her father, so they could talk about the happy, positive memories she had of her dad. “I thought it would give her the opportunity to use her creativity to talk about her father and relieve some of that stress,” Myra says. “That first year, we did a lot of crying together, but it all paid off.” Saleen stopped pulling her hair out.

Myra’s lesson to Saleen during that time was one that she continues to carry with her: “Bad things happen in life, but the way you react to them makes a huge difference.”

After Myra and Saleen had been matched for a few years, they both had to face something that tested that lesson.

“In August of 2016, I was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer. I completed 16 rounds of chemotherapy. In February 2017, I was diagnosed with Stage 4 metastatic breast cancer,” Myra says. “The cancer had spread to my spine.”

Myra was terrified to tell Saleen. “This little girl had already experienced such a big loss in her life,” Myra says. “I didn’t want to contribute any more anxiety.”

Myra went through months of treatments. She was vulnerable to infection, so there were stretches of time when she couldn’t see Saleen. Instead, they called each other and sent cards. Saleen and her mom ran a 5K race that raised money and awareness of breast cancer. “Myra was so committed and strong for my daughter at a time when she honestly didn’t have to be,” Saleen’s mom says.

Eventually, Saleen and her mom were again permitted to visit Saleen’s Big Sister. Yes, her Big Sister has cancer, Saleen says. “But that never stopped her from smiling. Even though we couldn’t see each other that often, we would have the time of our lives when we did.”

Recently, Myra’s doctors pronounced her “NED,” or “No Evidence of Disease.” She is back to seeing Saleen regularly. As Big Brothers Big Sisters of America’s National Big Sister of the Year, Myra is looking forward to her five-year match anniversary with her Little Sister and continuing to teach her lessons that will empower and inspire her potential.

Left to Right: Little Sister Saleen, Big Sister Myra, Comcast NBCUniversal’s VP of Procurement, Jennifer Yohe, BBBSA’s President and CEO, Pam Iorio
Big Sister Jacquelyn and Little Sister Alicia

Big Sister Jacquelyn and Little Sister Alicia

Jacquelyn knew the strain that having an incarcerated parent could have on a child, as her father had been incarnated most of her life. When she heard about Big Brothers Big Sisters’ Amachi program, which pairs mentors with children who have incarcerated parents, she signed up to be a Big Sister to help a child in a similar situation.

“I [signed up] in hopes to help and be a role model to a kid who might need that in their life,” Jacquelyn says. “To just be an extra support.”

She was matched with 12-year-old Alicia, who had been experiencing a lot of transitions in her life due to death and incarceration affecting her family. When they were first matched, Little Sister Alicia and her two younger brothers were splitting time between living with their grandmother and step-grandmother. Alicia carried a lot of emotional weight and her family expected a lot out of her.

“She has become a wonderful, beautiful, hardworking, smart, funny, generous and loving young woman.”

– Big Sister Jacquelyn

“I wanted the match to be fun and exciting, a way for her to escape these responsibilities for an hour or so,” Jacquelyn says.

What they did with that hour didn’t always come easy for them. In the beginning, they had a hard time choosing what to do, so they tried everything they could imagine. Rock climbing, mini-golfing, ice skating, horseback riding. Nothing was off limits.

As time went on, instability returned to Alicia’s home life and the continuation of her match with Jacquelyn became uncertain.

“She moved several times and I had no idea where she was or how to get a hold of her,” Jacquelyn says. “I didn’t know if she wanted to continue it.”

Through those turbulent times, their Match Support Specialist worked hard to keep everyone updated and connect Alicia and Jacquelyn over the phone. After a couple months, things smoothed out at home for Alicia and the match continued with an even stronger bond.

“When we hung out during these times she kept my mind off of it,” Alicia says. “She would ask me if I wanted to talk about the things going wrong. Sometimes we did and others we did not because I didn’t feel up to it, but she was always there.”

Overcoming the moments of uncertainty brought the two even closer. Now, Alicia is set to graduate high school and credits Jacquelyn with helping her get there.

“I more than likely would have ended up in a troubled life, but she kept on being there for me and helping me find myself throughout our years together,” Alicia says. “Jacquelyn will always be that person who gave me my confidence, taught me how to have fun, and was the best sister anyone could ask for.”

Big Brother Kyle and Little Brother Monterro

Big Brother Kyle and Little Brother Monterro

When Monterro was 6, he was already reading at a fifth-grade reading level. Monterro’s mom was proud of her son’s intelligence, but as a single parent with health problems, she feared not being able to help Monterro reach his full potential. She heard about Big Brothers Big Sisters and signed Monterro up to be a Little, hoping that a Big Brother might be able to be there for Monterro in a way that she couldn’t. Her expectations were exceeded when he was matched with Big Brother Kyle.

“Because of my physical health, I am not able to do the activities I would like to with Monterro, and that is where Kyle comes in,” Monterro’s mom says. “He is able to do things and go places that I am unable to do and go.”

“I thought it would be so boring simply because I didn’t know what I would be doing. What happened in the next four years was the opposite of boring.”

– Little Brother Monterro

Big Brother Kyle and Little Brother Monterro have explored museums, visited planetariums, and learned new things, like how to play golf.

Monterro’s mom credits Kyle with helping Monterro become more confident in himself and excel in school, as the two often made visiting the library one of their outings. In the four years they have been matched, Monterro has done so well that he has skipped several grades. At age 11, he is a seventh-grader.

“Monterro is an impressionable boy and having Kyle as a positive male role model has been crucial,” Monterro’s mom says. “I am confident that their relationship has helped in Monterro being promoted so many grades in school.”

From the day they met, Kyle knew that they would form the perfect match.

“At the end of the meeting, I discovered that Monterro lives on a street in Flint named in honor of my late grandfather,” Kyle says. “I took that as a providential sign that this was the young man I was intended to have as my Little.”

Monterro, on the other hand, seemed to have missed the signs. At 7, he had his doubts.

“I thought it would be so boring simply because I didn’t know what I would be doing,” he says. “What happened in the next four years was the opposite of boring.”

Big Sister Jessica and Little Sister Alejandra

Big Sister Jessica and Little Sister Alejandra

One afternoon over burgers, Little Sister Alejandra shared with her Big Sister Jessica a story that changed their relationship and their entire lives. Jessica remembers her heart breaking as Alejandra revealed to her that she was experiencing a situation at home that no child should ever have to endure.

As a volunteer, Jessica was taught what to do if a child came to her with a major challenge, but she remembers mostly feeling scared for her Little Sister and angry that she was experiencing something terrible.

“It still feels surreal, six years later, but I went into autopilot in contacting Big Brothers Big Sisters,” Jessica says. “With the help of my match support specialist, steps were taken to ensure Ale’s safety.”

Alejandra is in a safe place now, partly because she was able to open up to a trusted adult, her Big Sister. Building that trust took Big Sister Jessica’s time and dedication.

“She’s super smart, kind and loving, but what I love most is that she uses strength to make me feel safe,” Alejandra says.

“Though we have become incredibly close over the last seven years, her ambition and kindheartedness never fail to surprise me as she continues to mature.”

– Big Sister Jessica

Jessica built that sense of security simply by interacting with Alejandra and offering a listening ear when she needed one. They pored over children’s books at Barnes & Noble, danced and sang in the car to their favorite songs, and gave each other nicknames. Jessica began calling Alejandra “Chickadee” for how fiercely protective she was of her.

When Alejandra disclosed what she was experiencing, Jessica knew she needed her Big Sister more than ever.

“Through it all, Ale and I talked often: sometimes about what happened, and sometimes about nothing at all,” Jessica says. “I knew that as a young girl, this could impact the rest of Ale’s life and I was determined to help her turn this situation into a positive.”

In the years since, Alejandra has had many positives. She’s now an AP and Honors student in high school with a 4.0 GPA. She spends time volunteering and was recently elected captain of her school’s color guard. Jessica has been there to offer leadership advice, encourage her to ask questions to her teachers, and remind her that she is a survivor.

“Knowing she has always been there for me no matter which way life turns has given me more confidence to try new experiences,” Alejandra says. “I push myself because I see what she has accomplished and know that no matter what happens, Jessica will make me feel worthy and loved.”

By not letting her situation define her and continuing to push herself to do more, Alejandra has proven how strong she is, Jessica says.

“This past fall, Ale became a High School Big through Big Brothers Big Sisters to mentor a child at a local elementary school,” Jessica says. “Though I have never believed in pushing Ale into a single definition of success, I was touched that she chose to follow in my footsteps.”

The following in footsteps may continue, as Alejandra plans to graduate high school and go to college, where she will study to become a family therapist or a social worker, so she can help people in need, just as her Big Sister did for her.