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Dre’Von grew up surrounded by girls, with an older sister and two younger sisters, so his mother decided to enroll him as a Little Brother.  She felt Dre’Von could use a positive male model in the form of a Big Brother, and he was matched with Tyler.

“Dre’Von and me have been matched for almost three years now,” Tyler says. “But it definitely feels like we’ve been hanging out for much longer.”

“When we met, we were cool with each other right away.”

– Big Brother Tyler

Dre’Von was quiet at first, but the two bonded over video games. They got to know each other while laughing and duking it out on games of Madden and NBA 2K. As their bond strengthened, they began exploring the world beyond video games. They’ve visited the Seattle Zoo and agreed their favorite animal is the wolf, and have also seen two of their professional sports teams play.

“We’ve been to a Mariners game on a perfect fall Friday evening, and recently were sponsored to go to a Seahawks game and saw the brightest neon jerseys ever worn in football history,” Tyler says.

Coming from a house with three sisters and his mom, Dre’Von really appreciates all the fun he can have with Tyler. The two are able to talk trash to each other and joke around about things going on around them.

“We treat each other like family and it’s really nice,” Dre’Von says. “I love having a guy to hang out with.”

The two have shown that they can have fun together, but it’s Tyler’s dedication to the match that makes the fun and impact possible. When Dre’Von was living in transitional housing, Tyler never hesitated to make the drive to a new location to pick him up and hang out with him. When Dre’Von needed , Tyler rearranged his schedule so that he could pick up some from the Big Brothers Big Sisters office and deliver them to Dre’Von.

“Since Dre’Von has been matched, he has been happier, and loves when he goes with his Big Brother,” Dre’Von’s mom says.

Dre’Von is still years from graduating, but Tyler has already started him thinking about college. He’s taken Dre’Von to college campuses just to throw the football around, and Dre’Von has already begun to talk to him about what it would be like for him to attend one of the universities. The day will come eventually, but for now, Tyler is just enjoying the match and watching the once-quiet boy grow and mature. He says, “I’m looking forward to keeping our relationship going and seeing him continue to become more and more confident over time.”

One of the first things Annie did when she moved to Salt Lake City was look into volunteering with Big Brothers Big Sisters. As she was going through her trainings and waiting to meet her Little Sister, Annie started learning things about her new home. One of the things she learned was that Salt Lake City has a large refugee population. During her interview with Big Brothers Big Sisters staff, they asked if she would be interested in being matched with a refugee youth.

“It was as if the person interviewing me looked right into my soul and saw something that I didn’t know about myself yet,” Annie says. “I immediately knew that I would prefer to mentor a refugee youth.”

Annie was matched with Little Sister Sabina, who was a 6-year-old Nepali refugee. Sabina had watched her older sister get a Big, and she was excited to meet her own Big Sister. When the day came to meet her Big, Sabina was a lot shyer than she expected.

“I know that I’m Sabina’s mentor and that there are probably a few things she has learned through our relationship and interaction, but I think I’ve benefited from this relationship the most.”

– Big Sister Annie

“Sabina was very quiet, and her sisters were talking to her in Nepali telling her to sit by me and talk with me,” Annie says. “Thinking back on that moment gives me such joy and it also makes me laugh because Sabina is anything but nervous and quiet now.”

At the time Sabina admits to feeling lost and having few friends outside of her family she could count on, but as the outings with Annie continued to happen, Sabina shed her shyness and began to appreciate Annie’s role in her life.

“As a refugee with no English, getting the privilege of having a mentor was an amazing opportunity,” Sabina says. “Meeting Annie was really one of the best things to happen to me.”

The two enjoyed getting manicures, visiting museums, and window shopping at the mall. Annie has helped Sabina with her schoolwork by reading with her at the library and challenging her with math problems while in the car. Sabina’s mother says she has noticed the positive impact that Annie has had on her daughter.

“Sabina has gone from very shy and quiet to a young woman who is very nice and confident. Annie has helped her become this by being her sister and friend,” Sabina’s mom says.

Sabina hasn’t been the only one to grow during the course of this match. Annie says she knows she has benefited from the relationship as much as her Little Sister. Being introduced to Nepali culture and getting to know Sabina’s family has changed her life.

“The trust that her parents gave me immediately after meeting them was also inspirational,” Annie says. “The family has taught me so much about acceptance and love and because of my relationship with them I have become an advocate for refugees here in America.”

Annie has become more than an advocate. Nearly a year ago, Annie and her husband began fostering two refugee girls from Somalia, and now are caring for them as parents. Annie adding two kids to her family has not led to any jealousy in the parties involved, but instead to admiration.

“My daughters saw our relationship and wondered if they too could have a Big Sister,” Annie says. “I’m very happy to report that both of them now have their own Big Sister through the program.”

Big Brother Roy did not have the best upbringing. He grew up with an abusive father, and after an incident with him, Roy made a promise to himself.

“I swore to myself, if I ever had children, I would not treat them the way my father had treated me,” he says. “My guiding rule was that whatever my father would have done, I would do just the opposite.”

Big Brother Roy raised two sons who grew up to be independent and responsible, just like him. When they left the house, Roy says he experienced “empty nest” syndrome. He tried curing it by babysitting his three granddaughters, serving at his church, and taking up new hobbies, but nothing seemed to fill the void.

After reading about Big Brothers Big Sisters in the newspaper, Roy signed up to be Big. He was matched with Little Brother Cahill, who wasn’t your typical 12-year-old.

“Our son Cahill was diagnosed at a very early age with Asperger’s, a high-functioning form of Autism where they have poor social and communication skills, and we knew he would have a challenge developing relationships,” Cahill’s mom says. “Big Brothers Big Sisters seemed like it would be a great opportunity for our son to get paired with someone that could explore different activities outside of the family dynamic and who could become a mentor for him.”

“Whenever I was frustrated or upset about something, I’ve been able to talk to Roy about it.”

– Little Brother Cahill

Roy says his mentoring relationship with Little Brother Cahill developed slowly. Like all matches, they had some awkward outings in the beginning, but eventually, they bonded over superheroes and video games. They also spent time around Lake Thunderbird and took annual trips to the state fair.

“We’ve done so many different things together,” Little Brother Cahill says.

Roy noticed that Cahill’s attitude was evolving from “I’m only doing this because my parents are making me” to excitedly bursting out the front door when Roy’s truck approached. Cahill began greeting Roy every time by saying, “Hey, dude.”

Roy points to one moment when he truly felt assured of connection with Cahill. They were driving, and Roy got a phone call from a family member, who told him that his mother had been found in her apartment, unresponsive. Roy apologized to Cahill and told him that he would have to drop him off and rush to the hospital. Roy’s mother died that night.

The next week when Roy picked up Cahill, the first thing Cahill said was, “Hey, dude, how is your mom doing?” Roy told him that she had died, and that he and his wife would have to fly to South Texas to scatter her ashes. Cahill said he was sorry, and he insisted on going with them to South Texas. It was difficult for Roy to explain why Cahill couldn’t come, but the sincere expression of caring brought tears to Roy’s eyes.

“That was a defining moment in our relationship,” Big Brother Roy says.

Their relationship has only grown stronger since then. When Cahill was 17, Roy asked him if he wanted to continue their weekly activities, wondering whether he might be growing out of it. Cahill only response was, “Of course, dude.”

Roy says, “What began as an attempt to find purpose in my life has evolved into what might become a life-long friendship between Cahill and the ‘dude.’”

Shannon was sitting in traffic when she saw an ad on the back of a bus that changed her life forever. “You can could be a Big Brother or Big Sister,” it read, and she believed it. She signed up and was matched with Little Sister Courtney.

Courtney’s childhood had been tough, with drugs and alcohol affecting her family and her dad incarcerated at the time of her match. This inspired Shannon, as she saw a lot of herself in Courtney during their first match meeting.

“She needed a positive role model in her life just like I did when I was her age,” Shannon says. “From that day meeting her, I have tried to provide this for her in every interaction we share.”

Early on, these interactions including going to the zoo, working on homework, and playing at local parks. As the Courtney got older, they began hitting local coffee shops, exploring museums, and talking about life and the future.

“We are truly more than just a match — we are family and will forever be sisters.”

– Big Sister Shannon

The two have also made it a point to be there for each other’s important milestones. Shannon was there for Courtney’s 13th and 16th birthdays, and her first homecoming dance, and all the ones that followed. In return, Courtney was there for one of Shannon’s biggest milestones.

“She stood next to me in my wedding in 2013 as a junior bridesmaid on one of the most important days of my life,” Shannon says.

Throughout their time together, Courtney’s grades have steadily improved and she is now in high school and already taking college courses. She’s also volunteered on numerous occasions at soup kitchens and became a Big Sister herself through an afterschool program. Courtney gives a lot of credit to Big Sister Shannon for encouraging her to take college prep classes and going to volunteering events with her.

“Over these past eight years, Shannon has truly changed my life for the better,” she says.

The two thank each other for changing one another’s lives, but they owe a thanks to that ad on the back of a bus.

Big Brother Jason wasn’t always a perfect role model. When he was young, he started down the wrong path. He repeatedly landed in juvenile detention, and he bounced to various group homes. When he was 12, he was matched with his own Big Brother through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Eastern Missouri.

At age 14, he found himself being tried as an adult. His Big Brother was there in the courtroom. “What he said to me changed my life,” Jason says. “He looked me in the eye and said, ‘Things are really bad right now. But someday, it will be better. I believe you’ll be okay.”

Hearing that and knowing that his Big Brother had faith in him was life-changing, Jason says. “I held onto the fact that someone else believed in me, and if my Big Brother believed someday things would get better, it was possible.”

Jason proved that his Big Brother was right. And years later, after turning his life around, he became a Big himself, and he was matched with Little Brother Donovan. Both were on the verge of big life changes. Jason was about to embark on a big entrepreneurial project, a donut shop, and Little Brother Donovan was about to start kindergarten.
Donovan’s mom wanted her son to have a Big Brother to introduce him to new experiences and provide guidance. “It is challenging to provide my son with the adequate male influence he needs, because he’s the only boy in the home, but Jason fills the void,” she says.

Donovan has struggled with his self-confidence, and Jason has helped him believe in himself. “When I took him to his first football game, as we watched the players on the field, I told him he could do that,” Jason says. “He looked at me wide-eyed and almost bewildered, and said, ‘You think I could do that?” The next week, Donovan told his mother he wanted to start playing football and running track.

“Jason takes time out to come to my school and have lunch with me, and that’s something that really makes my day.”

-Little Brother Donovan

Donovan has also learned about entrepreneurship and business from his Big Brother. Jason’s donut shop, Strange Donuts, has been a success, and Jason brings Donovan in to learn about management, baking, philanthropy, and accounting.

Jason also uses Strange Donuts to recruit volunteers and support Big Brothers Big Sisters of Eastern Missouri and the St. Louis community. He started “Strange Cares,” a program that provides scholarships for Big Brothers Big Sisters Littles who have a dream they want to pursue after high school. “What we’re doing with Strange Cares is scholarships for kids, but not in the conventional sense,” Jason says. “We don’t care if it’s hair school or Harvard, if you want to be a print maker or a tattoo artist, we want to help make these dreams possible.”

Donovan dreams of being successful like his Big Brother, and he’s on a good path so far. “His grades have improved from C average to A’s and B’s, and he is excelling in sports, making it all the way to compete in state championships,” Jason says. “He has had this in him the whole time, but he just needed to hear the words to believe it.”

Jason is happy to provide those words to his Little, just as his own Big Brother did many years ago.

At a young age, Little Sister Grace was adopted along with her twin brother and older brother. Her adoptive parents signed her up to be a Little, hoping she could get a Big Sister that could spend one-on-one time with her. In Big Sister Erin, Grace got that and so much more.

Erin had been looking for a way to give back to her community and being a Big Sister sounded perfect to her.

“A friend of mine had recently become a Big Sister and had been telling what it was like to have a new Little Sister who needed her so much,” she says. “So I signed up.”

Soon, Grace and Erin were ready for their first official match activity. Erin decided that baking might be a fun way to kick things off, but it didn’t go exactly as planned.

“If you know me, you know I’m a great cook, but a horrible baker,” Erin says. “It’s an art in which you have to follow the rules to the T, and that has never been my strong suit.”

“I’ve been allowed the privilege to watch her grow, stumble and fall and always get back up and move forward.”

– Big Sister Erin

Erin’s kitchen dripped with runny gingerbread dough. Smoke poured from the electric mixer.

“Her mixer literally blew up while she was mixing the ingredients together,” Little Sister Grace says. “We had to stop everything we were doing and go buy a new mixer so we could finish.”

In the eight years since, the two have raced on Mario Kart, studied vocabulary flash cards, fed ducks, and done so much more. They have found a real passion for giving back to their community, volunteering with Meals on Wheels, collecting toys for children during the holiday season, and stuffing buses full of school supplies.

Thanks to her match with Erin, Grace has grown into a generous, kind, responsible young woman who works hard and truly enjoys giving to others.

Grace’s parents think that one reason Big Sister Erin and Little Sister Grace developed such a special bond is because Erin was adopted, too.

“Trying to discover who you are is hard enough for each of us, but figuring that out without ever knowing your biological parents adds so many more challenges,” Grace’s mother says. “With Erin’s support, Grace has avoided so many pitfalls, helping her to navigate the difficulties and struggles we could never totally understand.”

In those years since nearly blowing up the kitchen during their first attempt at baking, the two have created an unbreakable bond that will continue long after the match ends.

“I’ve watched her grow in to an amazing young adult who has the opportunity to be great and make a difference in the world,” Erin says. “And at the same time, Grace has shaped who I am. Even though our time in the program is coming to an end, I will always be her sister and she will forever be mine.”

Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Kansas City shared a fantastic festive video detailing their Year in Review. The video uses scenes from classic Christmas movies to showcase some of the milestones they accomplished in 2017.

Bigs aren’t the only ones who can be role models. Little Brother Miles is a Human Rights Campaign (HRC) Youth Ambassador and is a role model for LGBTQ youth all over the country. He spoke at the 2017 “Time to Thrive” conference as the youngest of the 15 Youth Ambassadors.

After his speech, kids gathered around him to take photos. “I felt like because I’m a younger kid, that because I’m still going through high school, for the kids that look up to me as a Youth Ambassador, I’m more relatable,” he says.

Having a relatable role model is so important for kids, especially LGBTQ kids, Miles says. Since Miles began his process of coming out at age 11, he’s experienced what a lot of LGBTQ kids experience – kids at school bullied him, and his family struggled to understand him and his identity.

“My whole middle school career was getting bullied every day no matter what,” Miles says.

Miles persisted at school and insisted that he be called the correct name and that students and teachers use he/him/his pronouns. He even advocated for the sex-ed curriculum to be more inclusive of LGBTQ identities.

“Having a person who is a little bit older, who has gone through life, who can see you as a person, and how you identify yourself, having that person is not only validating, it’s comforting.”

– Little Brother Miles

With his family, Miles still struggles. “I am the first person to come out in my family as queer—the rest of my family is cis and straight, and it’s hard. Nobody in my family understands how hard I have it.”

Miles does have a lot of great adult role models in his life now, including at the Colorado LGTBQ community center Rainbow Alley, through HRC, and his Big Sister, Ava. Ava submitted a recommendation letter for Miles to become a Youth Ambassador and attended HRC’s Time to Thrive conference with him and his mom. Ava was also the one who connected Miles with Rainbow Alley, which gave him a safe space to be himself.

When Ava and Miles were first matched, Miles was just starting his coming out process, and had not identified yet as male. When he first started coming out, he didn’t hesitate to talk to Ava about it. He knew that she accepted him unconditionally, which was something he did not always feel from family and friends.

“Having a person who is a little bit older, who has gone through life, who can see you as a person, and how you identify yourself, having that person is not only validating, it’s comforting,” Miles says.

Miles and Ava have stayed close through the three years they have been matched, and she says it’s easy to see how he’s grown as a person.

The role of a Big isn’t to provide parenting, she says, but to listen and affirm. “Just be patient and don’t assume things, be curious about their identity, because they probably have enough people telling them who they are and how to be.”

When Miles grows up, he hopes to work as an advocate for LGBTQ people, to continue to be a role model. Because of the work he’s done in coming out and sharing his story, he says, he hopes that what he has gone through will create a safer, more accepting world.

Little Brother Mondre was in fifth grade when his mother looked into getting him a Big Brother through BBBS of Northeast Iowa. Mondre’s father was not in the picture, and she felt he needed a positive male role model in his life.

“We hit the jackpot with Eric,” Mondre’s mother says.

Eric signed up to be a Big after the youngest of his two daughters left for college. He had a lot more time on his hands, and rather than spend it perfecting his golf swing or building a man cave, he decided to get involved in a young man’s life.

“I have come to realize that my life is generally more fulfilling when the focus is on others and not solely on myself,” Eric says.

“Neither one of us are the type that want to sit around and talk about our thoughts and feelings, but through our consistent interaction those do come out.”

– Big Brother Eric

Big Brother Eric and Little Brother Mondre immediately bonded over their shared interest in sports. They played basketball one-on-one, threw darts, and attended sporting events. Eric took Mondre to his first Iowa Hawkeyes football and basketball games.

Eric knew Mondre loved sports, but one of his goals was to expose Mondre to as many other experiences as possible. When he noticed that Mondre was choosing the same restaurant every time they went out to eat, he pushed him to try new places. “We agreed that we would not eat at the same restaurant twice,” Eric says. “That has led us to dozens of different dining experiences – some great, and some not so great, but always a new experience.”

Eric also pushed for Mondre to be exposed to college. Whenever they went to watch the Hawkeyes play, Eric wanted him to have fun, but he also wanted Mondre to be able to picture himself among the students. “I don’t want college to seem like something that is unattainable or outside his world,” Eric says, “but instead, something that he sees others not unlike himself doing and realizes it is something that is possible for him.”

Mondre says creating opportunities to try new restaurants and visit a college campus are only a couple of the things Eric has done for him. He gives Eric credit for showing him how to work out and how to use proper manners. As a lawyer, Eric has also shown Mondre the importance of having a good job. Mondre says that Eric has taught him so much, he could write a book about everything he has learned from his Big Brother.

“He has definitely become more than just a Big Brother,” Mondre says. “He is family to me, and I know that he will always be a part of my life.”

Eric echoes that sentiment, saying that that he started his mentoring journey believing he would have an impact, but that it has turned out that his life was impacted just as much.

They both hit the jackpot.

Nearly 10 years ago, Little Sister Jasmine was matched with Big Sister Jesse through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Kansas City. At the time, Jasmine thought that attending school was a low priority. If she missed the bus or just didn’t feel like going, she would stay home.

“There would be weeks when she would tell me about going to school only once or twice the entire week,” Jesse says. “I started to express the importance of not only getting good grades, but also attendance.”

Jesse did more than just express the importance. With her actions, she showed the importance. When Jasmine woke up late and missed her bus, Jesse would give her a ride to school. Jesse felt that it was better to arrive late than not attend at all.

“She’s someone I can talk to and call on for help with anything.”

– Little Sister Jasmine

Over time, Jasmine’s absences dwindled and so did her need for Jesse’s rides. Attendance had become a priority, and she never went back to her habit of waking up late and missing her bus.

“It was amazing to see her transform and really start to care about school,” Jesse says. “She would be so excited at the end of a week that she attended school every day. She would get in my car and light up telling me about it.”

By the time Little Sister Jasmine entered middle school, her focus shifted from just attending school to exceling at it. She stayed caught up on her schoolwork and pushed herself to do even more. At the ceremony for students finishing 8^th grade and entering high school, Jasmine gave a speech as the class valedictorian. She credits Jesse for her success.

“Without her help, these things wouldn’t have happened,” Jasmine says. “She’s the extra motivation I need sometimes for whenever I change my mind or want to give up. She’s an amazing Big Sister and a very good role model.”

Jasmine’s academic success is only part of their match. They talk a lot about goals and schoolwork, but they also enjoy baking desserts, visiting parks, and attending concerts. Jesse also helped Jasmine land her first job at a local AMC.

“Sometimes I forget that the program is the reason I met her,” Jasmine says. “I don’t see her as just a match through the program, I see her as an actual Big Sister.”

Jasmine recently graduated high school and is now in college. She attends one of the schools that she and Jesse visited together on a college tour. When Jasmine loaded her stuff into her freshman dorm room, Jesse was there with Jasmine’s entire family to help her move in.

The school is in a different city, so Jasmine can’t quite get Jesse to give her a ride if she wakes up late, but the things Jasmine learned from Jesse will always be with her.