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Big Brother Brian was used to being a little brother. He was one of two children, and his brother was less than a year older. When they were both still in college, Brian’s brother passed away suddenly. The loss was a huge blow.

“Being so involved in each other’s lives for 22 years, I could not imagine my life experiences without a brother,” Brian says.
When he learned about Big Brothers Big Sisters and one-to-one mentoring, he knew he had to get involved. “I thought back to my experiences as a younger brother and the importance of our relationship,” he says. Being a Big Brother would be a tribute to his big brother’s legacy.
About seven years ago, Brian was matched with Little Brother Rhyeem. Back then, Rhyeem was shy and had trouble making friends.

“I trust Brian because he always takes time to listen and answer my questions, and I know he will always be there for me.”
– Little Brother Rhyeem

In a short period of time, Rhyeem grew less shy and more comfortable in social situations. He lost his fear of dogs and large crowds. He learned how to shake hands and how to introduce himself to strangers. “Because Brian is my friend, this made me feel confident about being able to make more friends,” Rhyeem says. “Every September after meeting Brian, I started to feel more excited and less nervous about going back to school.”

Now, Rhyeem’s mom says she can barely remember her son being shy. She enrolled him as a Little Brother because as a single mom, it was hard for her to understand what her young son was going through. “For things like sports, friendships, and relationships I felt Rhyeem could use a male figure in his life,” she says.

Brian has filled that role by spending time with Rhyeem and teaching him new things. “Brian taught me how to play basketball games at the park, how to feed animals at the zoo, how to carve a pumpkin, make dinner, and shop for groceries,” Rhyeem says. “It’s important to me that we’re able to do things that guys do together since it was always just me and my mother in the house.”

Both Big Brother Brian and Little Brother Rhyeem have moved since they were match, and the match has persisted. Rhyeem was an usher in Brian’s wedding, and they now consider one another family. “It makes me feel special and important that Brian has continued to spend time with me while also making me part of his family,” Rhyeem says. “Through all of the changes in our lives since we met, Brian and I are still best friends.”

When Big Brother Dick first met his Little Brother, Aaron was a shy 9-year-old living with his single mom. They hiked up Arizona’s Pima Canyon Trail, and Big Brother Dick began building Aaron’s confidence with small adventures.

“I was providing him with a positive male figure in his life, since his father had been entirely absent,” Dick says, “and he was the surrogate grandson I didn’t have.”

Eventually, Big Brother Dick noticed that Little Brother Aaron wasn’t attending school regularly. He was supposed to be riding his bike to school, but he would often succumb to the temptation of riding off with friends and skipping class. His grades suffered.

“I decided to make it my mission to change this pattern of behavior,” Dick says. “I have two sons, much older now, and I felt this time in his life, like theirs, could very well set the pattern for his entire future.”

“Friends come and go, but brothers are forever.”
– Little Brother Aaron

Little Brother Aaron’s adventures with his Big Brother out in the community were going well, but at home, Aaron’s life started getting intense and stressful. He had to leave his house and started staying with a friend, not sure how long he would be welcome. He was in desperate need of a new living situation. Big Brother Dick helped him find a group home for boys dealing with similar circumstances. “After the first year of some painful adjustments, Aaron has become the fine young man that I knew he was all along,” Dick says.

Oscar, a staff person at the home, says Dick’s influence had a major effect when Aaron was struggling at school. The staff at the home tried over and over again to persuade Aaron to concentrate on schoolwork, but nothing they did worked. No matter what, they couldn’t motivate him. Then Big Brother Dick stepped in.

“Dick attended an educational meeting for Aaron, and the fact of him being in that meeting had a deep effect on Aaron, because someone who Aaron has high respect for was hearing the areas that he was struggling in,” Oscar says.

After that meeting, Aaron went from an unmotivated student not passing his classes to an honor roll student. “When I have bad grades, he tells me to correct them and motivates me to do so,” Aaron says. Now, Aaron is doing well in his second year of high school. He has even earned a leadership role in his junior ROTC program.

As a single father, Leah’s dad didn’t have all the answers. He didn’t know how to think about things from a girl’s point of view. Knowing his 11-year-old needed a positive female role model, he enrolled her in Big Brothers Big Sisters.

A little over a year ago Sally attended a Nerium “Get Real” conference, where the company encouraged Brand Partners like herself to learn more about Big Brothers Big Sisters. “They also feature amazing stories about the matches, which piqued my interest,” she says. A co-worker signed up as a volunteer, and soon after, Sally became a Big Sister.

She knew right away that she and Leah would be a good match. “Leah is incredibly smart, fun, mature, and a little sassy,” she says. In the past year, Little Sister Leah has opened up to her Big Sister. “She has always been outgoing and talkative, but now I feel like we are really comfortable with each other,” she says.

“The bond that the two have grown will continue for the rest of their lives.”
– Little Sister Leah’s dad

Leah was all smiles and giggles when they were first matched, but she says she was struggling on the inside. Her dad decided to sign her up to get a Big Sister, she says, because he could see she was sad, and he wanted her to have someone to spend time with and learn from besides him. “At the time, I was kind of depressed because a lot had happened a few months before,” she says. “Sally helped me cope with the situations and helped me get better.”

Big Sister Sally and Little Sister Leah are frequent volunteers at their local animal shelter. Leah loves animals, so they also spend time grooming and feeding horses. They also do crafts, go shopping and try out makeup tips. In the first year of their match, spending time with her Little Sister has had a big impact on Sally, too. “I am learning patience and selflessness,” she says. “It makes me feel good to know that I can assist Leah’s dad in helping her become a strong, independent young woman who knows she is special and loved.”

On a long canoe trip down the Guadalupe River, Big Brother Santiago let Little Brother Ryan, 16, navigate. “We agreed on what the commands would be for directions, and I taught him how to read the current, so his job was to look for rocks and low spots as we passed through small rapids,” Santiago says. At first, Santiago watched just as closely as he would have if he was the one navigating. But it was soon clear that Ryan was taking his job seriously, and Santiago was confident in Ryan’s ability to navigate them safely down the river. “His attention to detail and ability to follow directions never ceases to amaze me,” Santiago says.

When they were first matched about three years ago, Ryan wasn’t so open to learning from Santiago. He wasn’t open to bonding with his Big Brother at all. At their first match meeting, Ryan was distant and uncomfortable. He only answered when asked a direct question. Raised by his grandmother and disappointed by others who had come into his life for a short time, he was wary of Santiago. “Ryan was opposed to opening himself up to another person that may get up and leave at any given time,” Ryan’s grandma says.

“I’ve seen that with hard work and dedication, you can get somewhere in life. With heart and compassion, you become someone you respect and others respect and value as well.”
– Little Brother Ryan

Big Brother Santiago understood Ryan’s reluctance, and patiently tried to find ways to connect with the teenager. Santiago loves the outdoors, so he found activities they could do together outside, like canoeing. They bonded over their shared sense of humor, and Santiago won Ryan over by being there for him consistently. “His humor and dedication is inspirational to me,” Ryan says. “He takes the time out of his day, time out of his life, to spend time with someone he had nothing in common with.”

Ryan’s grandmother has seen Big changes in her grandson as a result of his relationship with Santiago. He has gained self-confidence and learned to interact more positively with both peers and adults. “Ryan has grown to be more aware of his actions as well as maintaining his grades and considering his future in the bigger picture,” she says.

A first generation college student with a successful career, Santiago first got involved with Big Brothers Big Sisters of South Texas because he wanted to positively affect his Little Brother’s commitment to school and help him plan for the future. He uses each outing to teach his Little Brother, share a new perspective or teach a new skill – like paddling carefully down a river in a canoe. “To me, it’s not about being able to go to a movie or a quick outing,” Ryan says, “it’s the fact that I learned something out of every experience in life.”

Having a male role model was a completely new experience for Little Brother Tennessee. When he was matched with Big Brother Daine, he was 8, and he had never had a father or father figure in his life. Big Brother Daine says he sees the role of a Big Brother not as a father but as someone who simply fills in the gaps for the Little. As the Little grows, the gaps change.

“As a kid, the gaps were simpler, like teaching him to tie his own shoes, showing him how to set the hook, and how to hit a baseball,” he says. As Tennessee grew older, the gaps changed, and Daine’s role entailed answering questions about driving and jobs and listening to stories about friends and girls.

Daine has also spent time helping Tennessee when he was struggling with school or struggling just to get to school. When the truancy officer started coming around, Daine started calling to make sure Tennessee made it to school, and volunteered to pick him up and take him to school if he hadn’t made it. When it came time for Tennessee to start working part-time, Daine helped him navigate finding a job and opening his own bank account.

“We have a very good relationship and no matter what, we can always get through any problems.”
– Little Brother Tennessee

Having a male role model for Tennessee has been a relief for Daine’s mom. “He is someone he can talk to and do things with,” she says. “I think he has given Tennessee options to think about solutions to problems.” For a while, she says, Tennessee was edgy, but now he is much easier to talk to. Daine describes him as happy and polite. “Tennessee’s positive attitude and absolute kindness, as well as his charm and knack for reading people, will propel him toward a happy and fulfilling life.”

When they were first matched, Big Brother Daine and Little Brother Tennessee bonded over hitting golf balls, playing Frisbee golf, and tossing the football. As Tennessee grew up, they began to get more adventurous, going snow tubing and go-kart racing. It sounds like all fun, but their adventures meant a lot to Tennessee’s mom. “He has taken Tennessee to do things that I would not otherwise be able to bring him to do,” she says, “and given him a life that I would not be able to.”

The impact of the Big on the Little is usually what is celebrated, but often, the impact of the Little on the Big is just as profound. “When signing up to be a Big, I didn’t have many expectations,” Daine says. “I figured I’d meet a young boy who wanted a friend to play at the park with once in a while. I had no idea I would meet such a charismatic little guy whom I’d bond with for years to come.”

Little Sister Dasha admits that for a long time, she saw school “as a joke.” She was not convinced she should spend time studying. She associated school with being bullied, and her grades suffered because she was not taking it seriously. Big Sister Laurie had to work hard to make sure Dasha understands why school is important and she has shown her Little Sister that she can excel.

“School has been a challenge for Dasha, so we have used our time together to problem-solve regarding school issues,” Big Sister Laurie says. “I was able to get Dasha into a tutoring program through Communities in Schools to help with her studies.”

Dasha says that Big Sister Laurie helped her see that her grades would impact her future. Dasha and Laurie visited a college campus together, and they have explored some possible career paths. Little Sister Dasha says she wants to be a traveling nurse or a flight attendant.

For over a decade, Little Sister Dasha and Big Sister Laurie have been matched through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northeast Florida. Dasha’s aunt, her guardian, decided to enroll Dasha soon after she assumed custody of Dasha, who was just 6. “I was unsure as to how I could improve her situation and life,” her aunt says. “I was not sure how to help her cope with the loss of having a mother to care for her. I found out about Big Brothers Big Sisters and reached out.”

I’m excited to see what the future holds for this special young woman, and I know I want to be part of that promising future.
– Big Sister Laurie

Big Sister Laurie has seen Dasha through some big childhood moments. She was there when Dasha was struggling with school. She helped her deal with being bullied. She took her to the DMV to pick up her driver’s handbook and helped her study for her permit. Then she sat patiently in the passenger seat and helped Dasha learn to drive.

These big moments and everyday situations gave Big Sister Laurie and Little Sister Dasha the chance to learn something new about the world and about one another. When Laurie took Dasha kayaking for the first time, she turned it into a lesson about wind direction and tidal changes. Bike rides when Dasha was young were also lessons about telling right from left.

When Little Sister Dasha was 15, her Big Sister Laurie took her to a local restaurant. She helped Dasha fill out a job application and encouraged her to introduce herself to the manager when she dropped it off. “By the time we got home, she had a call to inform her that she was hired,” Big Sister Laurie says. For over a year now, Dasha has been working as a hostess and a food runner, and is learning many valuable skills. “We use her work experiences to discuss how to interact with customers and fellow workers, and how to use these experiences to determine the pros and cons of future career choices,” Big Sister Laurie says.

By making sure Little Sister Dasha learns a lot in little moments and is supported through big moments, Big Sister Laurie has had a big impact. “As a guardian of a child, I cannot emphasize enough how helpful it has been to show my niece that there are many people in the world who create your family,” Dasha’s aunt says. “Laurie has definitely become one of ours.”

After his father left, Horacio was missing more than someone to toss a football with. He was in need of a positive male role model who could show a boy through his example how to be strong and kind. Big Brother Ron has been an example of those things for Little Brother Horacio. “My natural instinct was to offer advice as if he was my child,” Big Brother Ron says, “but instead I willed myself to listen and to put myself in his shoes.”

Big Brother Ron entered Little Brother Horacio’s life just as Horacio’s father was leaving. “We were going through a tough time when his dad left home,” Horacio’s mom says. “Horacio was lonely, sad and depressed by the abandonment by his father.”

For the past five years, Big Brother Ron has been a steady role model in Horacio’s life. They throw the football around, attend Minor League Baseball games, and fold and fly paper airplanes in the park. Ron talks to him about the importance of getting good grades, and how that will help him fulfill his dreams.

Being a Big Brother is not always easy. One day when Little Brother Horatio came home drunk and high, his mother’s reaction made him worry about how his Big Brother would respond. “My mom was very worried about me and was sad to see me that way,” Horatio says. He even went to his match support specialist to talk about his poor choices before explaining what happened to his Big Brother.

“Being a Big means being a friend. I’m not there to judge him, but to offer understanding, care and direction.”
– Big Brother Ron

“Ron and I talk about anything, including my poor decision-making,” Little Brother Horacio says. He says he stopped drinking and using drugs, and is motivated to do better in school. “I want to bring my grade up to at least a B and do well in school, not only for me, but also to make my Big Brother proud of me,” he says. As Horacio has worked to make better choices, Big Brother Ron has been there to support him. “Thanks to Ron, Horacio has stopped using illegal substances and has done a great job at avoiding gang involvement and other risky behaviors,” Horacio’s mom says.

Little Brother Horacio told his Big Brother that he aspired to be a Marine. When Big Brother Ron asked why, Horacio said it was because as a Marine, he would be able to make a difference. “I thought about this and realized this little boy has a huge heart and cares about people,” Ron says. “In his own mind, he’s projecting himself as a hero in real life.”

At this point, improving his social choices, avoiding peer pressure, doing well in school, and preparing for college are things Horacio wants, but they are things that seem incredibly challenging. Ron tells him to enjoy the journey along the path, not just the end itself, but the path forward seems about as easy as climbing Mt. Everest, Ron says. “But I encourage him, and let him know that all of us have looked at that same mountain,” Ron says. “If you take one positive step at a time, you’ll get there.”

When Moranda’s mother first enrolled her in Big Brothers Big Sisters, she was looking for someone to bring Moranda out of her shell. One of four kids, Moranda was a shy child living in a small apartment with a single mother.

Moranda was in second grade when she was matched with Big Sister Nan. More than five years later, she’s shed her shyness. She’s now described as social, outgoing and adventurous. “Nan has given me confidence in everything I do,” Moranda says. “This includes school work, playing the violin, and singing in chorus.” The once-timid Little Sister has also given speeches at Big Brothers Big Sisters events, sharing their match story so others might volunteer or support Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northeast Iowa.

At “63 years young,” Big Sister Nan relies on Little Sister Moranda to let her know what pre-teen girls are into. “Despite our big age difference, she amazes me with how much she knows,” Nan says. “And I think I amaze her with how much I have experienced from living in what we like to call ‘the good ol’ days.’”

Big Sister Nan says they have learned together “the value of true friendship, trust, empathy, kindness, laughter, love, and faith.” Nan says she benefits just as much as Moranda does from the time they spend together baking, cooking, bowling, going to the movies, and having picnics.

“ No matter what paths our lives take, I hope we will always keep in touch and encourage each other. After our involvement with Big Brothers Big Sisters, our lives will never be the same.”
– Big Sister Nan

“Spending time with Moranda is like a very sunny day,” she says. Together, they work to spread that sunniness into their community. “We feel that no matter how little money we have, we can always do something to brighten another person’s day,” Big Sister Nan says. At a local nursing home, they have played games with the residents and sung Christmas carols.

Moranda’s mother says Nan’s positivity has had an effect on their whole family. “We have learned that if you surround yourself with good people and make an effort to recognize their positive contributions to your life, you will have less negative experiences with others,” she says.

Just knowing Moranda has her Big Sister’s support helps Moranda’s mother, she says. “Sometimes I am in a lot of pain due to my health,” she says, “but by speaking with Nan, my heart melts because I know that there are good people out there in this world.”