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Big Brother Tom spent 40 years working in the public school system – seven years as a teacher and 33 years in administration. He coached for 30 of those years and was always motivated by the relationships he had with his teams.

“The highlight was watching students grow into adulthood and become productive members of society and the ongoing communication I had had with these people as they grew,” Tom said. When Tom retired, he missed his ability to guide and affect youth, and when he wanted to find someone to help in a similar way, he looked to Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Lakeshore for a Little Brother.

Tom was matched with Little Brother Jake, who was struggling with his parents’ recent divorce. “I watched my son go through letdowns, disappointment, broken promises and heartbreak,” Jake’s mom said. Both she and Jake knew that he wanted more. He wanted a role model to help fill a gap in his life.

Jake says his first impression of Tom was, “Wow, I though he would be taller.” Height aside, right away, he liked him. Their first outings were short. They talked about what was going on in their lives, and built trust gradually. Tom took seriously that Jake had been let down a number of times. People would often tell Jake they would do something with him, but they wouldn’t follow through. Tom wanted to show Jake that he would be there and support him.

Places with arcade games or loud music are not places where you’ll find Tom and Jake. They prefer to meet where they can talk, like over sweet tea or Coca Cola at McDonalds. Tom gives advice, listens to Jake’s concerns, and encourages him in school and sports. Over time, as Jake opened up, Tom started to get to know the boy behind the shyness.

“Tom and I now joke around a lot, but I know that when he is being serious and when it’s time for me to get to business,” Jake said. Tom and Jake were matched when Jake was 10, and at that time, Jake was struggling with school, earning average and below average grades. He was a smart kid with a lot of potential, but when he didn’t turn in his homework, he fell behind and couldn’t catch up. Big Brother Tom helped Jake work with his teacher and got him caught up with the rest of his class. Now, Jake’s mom says, Jake makes the honor roll and strives to be the best student.

Tom’s encouragement helped Jake grow outside of the classroom as well. Jake now competes at wrestling and plays football, and Tom faithfully attends his games. Jake has also become a mentor himself, working with students with disabilities and mentoring a younger football player.

He is not shy about attributing much of his success in realizing his potential to his Big Brother. “Tom changed my outlook on life,” Jake said. “He showed me that there is more to life than being angry, being sad.”

Raised in a conflicted home, Big Sister Cathy knew that she wanted to be the kind of parent she never had. She remembers as a young teen wishing that she could share and confide in someone she could trust. “I lived in a world of surviving, not thriving,” Cathy said. Big Sister Cathy had two children and upon their departure to college she knew she had room in her life to be part of Big Brothers Big Sisters.

Cathy was matched with 12-year-old Christiana in late 2009. Christiana was a reserved girl with a traumatic early childhood history who lived with her adoptive mother. Christiana’s mother had her hands full with her disabled son and knew that this attention was at Christiana’s expense.

In their first meeting, Big Sister Cathy and Little Sister Christiana went to dinner and a movie. As their meeting ended, they immediately made plans for the following week to meet again and quickly began seeing each other four to five hours every other week. Their get-togethers involved cooking, baking, shopping, watching movies, miniature golf, jigsaw puzzles, craft projects and bowling. As they spent time together, Cathy often inserted guidance, shared wisdom and discussed coping skills with her Little Sister. Christiana started opening up more to Cathy, and she confided in her about the challenges she faced.

In her freshman year of high school, Little Sister Christiana was moved to an alternative school because she was having issues fitting in. Christiana ran away from home and had many disagreements with her mother. As a consequence of these actions, Christiana was placed in a juvenile facility.

Knowing the importance of their meetings, Cathy kept up with their meetings every other week, no matter what. Even the 90-minute drives didn’t stop Cathy from maintaining her commitment to Christiana.

“Through all of this, we stayed constant with our meeting schedule. I knew that she needed a friend that would listen to her and provide encouragement,” said Big Sister Cathy. “I always pointed out her good traits; knowing not to judge her harshly.”

Cathy always found ways to boost Christiana’s self-esteem and sought to help Christiana understand the value of her voice and belief in herself. By encouraging Christiana to use her critical skills, Cathy is teaching her Little Sister the importance of working on problems herself while understanding the results of her decisions. When situations get too complicated, Cathy provides Christiana a sounding board and Christiana knows what they talk about will be kept confidential.

Since returning home, Cathy and Christiana’s mom have seen a change in Christiana. Christiana is making a lot of good decisions and having stronger communication with her mom. Little Sister Christiana has been through many ups and downs in her 17 years, but Cathy has remained a constant and consistently a positive force in her life these past five years.

Struggling for consistency with both parents absent, Diamond’s grandmother looked at Big Brothers Big Sisters of Middle Tennessee to help her granddaughter with another adult for support. Little Sister Diamond was matched with Big Sister Janet in 2009. As Janet was getting to understand the areas that she could help Diamond with, she realized that her biggest role was simple: be there for Diamond.

“I struggled with ideas to be a great mentor, but then I am reminded by her focused attention to my words when we talk,” stated Big Sister Janet. “I don’t have to be super smart or creative here. Just be there. Just show up. Just be caring.”

When first matched, Janet and Diamond spent time at the lake, talking over dinner, or doing simple activities at Janet’s home. Their time allowed for conversation and getting to know one another. Janet and Diamond’s grandmother wanted the relationship to expose Diamond to new places, thoughts, and experiences. They both love to talk and stay connected. As they did activities, Diamond always wanted to explore that activity further. “At the end of a hike, she wants to be a botanist. I introduce her to quesadillas and then she wants to learn to cook. We talk about the office and she wants to be a businesswoman,” added Janet.

Their match has come with some challenges, however. Diamond has gone through some rough transitions at school and home. In early 2012, Diamond’s relationship with her grandmother became strained and her grandmother made the difficult decision to place Diamond into the custody of the Department of Children’s Services. Understandably, this was a heart-wrenching time for the family. While in DCS custody, Diamond struggled. She moved around multiple foster homes and would run away, then she finally found a level of stability in a group home. Throughout this time period, Janet kept close contact with Diamond and her grandmother to help where she could.

Janet loves Diamond and works determinedly to help her achieve success. Janet not only advocated on Diamond’s behalf, but she challenged Diamond to take initiative to make things happen. By taking Diamond’s hand and showing her how to be her own advocate, Janet helped Diamond find a voice in the chaos. Little Sister Diamond started to develop confidence in her abilities, talents, and above all, to believe in herself.

“Janet has been my voice when I had none. She believes in me and my family. She’s been a shoulder of support and more importantly, a real and true friend,” stated Little Sister Diamond.

Diamond often has said that Janet is someone who understands her and who doesn’t judge her. She’s someone she can talk to and who gives valuable advice. Through this advice, Diamond has been able to rise above all her challenges and is now looking forward to what the future holds.

While growing up, Jennifer would have loved a female role model adventure seeker. Instead, she settled for crashing her brother’s Boy Scout troop adventures in the hopes of learning about the outdoors – which her brother was not too thrilled about.

This passion for the outdoors led her to pursue a career in wildlife biology that always kept her on the go. “I trapped wolves in Minnesota, tracked sage-grouse in Wyoming, and measured salmon habitat in Washington,” Jennifer said. After a couple years of being a transient biologist and getting her master’s degree, she settled in Laramie, Wyoming. She immediately signed up to be a Big Sister and got matched with Little Sister Sarah.

Sarah’s mom wanted someone who could give Sarah more on-on-one time with activities and help to boost her self-confidence. What she got was so much more.

“As any Big, at the beginning, I was concerned that my Little might not like me or enjoy the activities I planned,” Big Sister Jennifer recalls. “Those concerns proved to be unfounded.” Sarah has a positive attitude, loves to laugh, and loves adventures.

Jennifer has taken the time to develop a strong foundation with her Little, and she created a great partnership with the family by being consistent and communicating with them. Jennifer has supported, encouraged and taught her Little positive behaviors. When they first were matched they would do activities that let them get to know one another. As their friendship strengthened and the trust was built, they started going on more adventures and helped each other grow by trying new things together.

Ice skating, skiing, rock climbing, kayaking, and white water rafting became part of their normal routine. As the activities grew in intensity, so did Jennifer’s attention to safety and education towards her Little. Jennifer has instilled the importance of safety in her Little as well as the trust in their training equipment. While training, Jennifer works to understand and teach Sarah what the protocols are as well as what her limits are to ensure her safety while participating in these activities. Encouragement is a big driving force in their relationship and Jennifer makes sure to never force Sarah into doing anything she is not comfortable doing.

The bond that Jennifer and Sarah have developed is what has helped Sarah grow and accomplish her own goals, such as going out for volleyball or learning how to kayak. Sarah’s parents are always excited to hear the amazing adventures they go on and think Jennifer has been a wonderful addition to Sarah’s life. Sarah’s mom stated, “I, as a parent, honestly could not ask for a better mentor for Sarah. Sarah really looks up to Jennifer because she is very outgoing and she shows Sarah what it is like to have a positive outlook in life.”

The feeling is mutual as Jennifer thinks how much Sarah has taught her in not taking life so seriously. “I’m grateful that Sarah has reminded me that it’s okay to be silly in public. That it’s OK to wear a fake mustache while baking cookies and it’s okay to break out in dance at any time,” Jennifer added. This match will continue to make fantastic memories together and have developed the foundation for a life-long friendship.

When Little Brother Kristopher’s mom made the decision to enroll her son in the Big Brothers Big Sisters program, she knew he needed some guidance. Little did she know that soon after being matched with Big Brother Richard, her son would lose contact with his dad. This event was one of the biggest challenges her son experienced and affected both his social life and his home life. Kristopher grew angry at the world and had very minimal communication with his mom. This is where Big Brother Richard stepped in and helped Kristopher cope with the loss of his dad. “Richard has showed me the brighter side of every negative situation,” stated Little Brother Kristopher. Richard knew that Kristopher didn’t need someone to lecture him and bring him down. Instead, “he fulfilled me with wisdom and knowledge, followed by corny jokes that always seemed to make me laugh in the moment,” added Kristopher.

Through constant motivation and commitment, Richard has showed his Little Brother there is a whole world to explore, no matter the challenges that life brings us. They are constantly going to events, plays, concerts and athletic games. “Every time we go, whether it’s eating, watching a play, or simply hanging out, he always guided me in the right direction and I have nothing but love and respect for him.” Despite Kristopher reaching his busy teenage years, he always makes time to meet with Richard. Their friendship and care for one another is apparent. Kristopher credits his improvements in life, such as doing better in school and communicating with his mom more, to his Big Brother. “I knew that mentoring him during these formidable years would help him become a more productive member of our community. He has truly enriched my life and shown me that it takes a village to raise a child,” mentioned Richard.

Growing up, Big Brother Richard realized that having a mentor is beneficial to kids like him who were raised in a single-parent household. Even though Richard is confined to a wheelchair, nothing has stopped him from accomplishing his dreams and creating impact by mentoring the youth in his local community. Throughout his career, Richard has assisted children throughout the Miami-Dade County Public School System by his work as a para-professional, and by creating various mentoring programs in a number of schools. Little Brother Kristopher has become a big part of this initiative by helping Richard set up the meetings and handle the paperwork to make sure each student is able to attend the program. Richard’s philosophy through his mentoring programs and in his relationship with Kristopher is that “leaders are not born, but grown through the positive influence and encouragement of their role models who took the time to mentor them.”

Many matches say they feel nervous prior to their first meeting, but that was not the case for Big Brother Ryan and Little Brother Zach. Both were excited and ready to start getting to know one another. In their first meeting in 2011, they hit if off right away and knew their friendship was going to be something special. Zach has dealt with some adult issues in his young life and Ryan has given him the opportunity to “just be a kid.” They love going to the movies, fishing and attending sporting events. One of their favorite things to do is just going out to dinner – whether it’s pizza, Chinese food or BBQ. It’s during this time that they catch up on what is going on in their lives. “We talk about academics, friends, family and everything under the sun. He knows that I am an open line of communication for him and that although some things are hard to talk about, he can talk to me and not worry about repercussion or punishment,” Big Brother Ryan said. Ryan shares his personal stories with Zach about conflicts he had while growing up and provides positive input to Zach on how to overcome his own family or peer struggles.

Through Ryan’s encouragement, Zach has increased self-confidence and is now able to stand up for himself. The struggle he found at school with bullies was one of the main reasons his parents sought out Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Minnesota. Zach’s mom couldn’t be happier with the support and guidance Ryan has provided. “Ryan has surpassed any and all expectations I ever had when seeking a Big Brother for my son. Ryan looks past Zach’s troubles and sees him for who he is.” Big Brother Ryan credits much of his success with Zach to Zach’s mother as she will let him know the good, the bad and the ugly. “My talks with her give me insight into Zach’s world that I would not otherwise have, and I truly appreciate the candor in which she delivers the information,” added Ryan.

In addition to his commitment to his Little Brother, Ryan has become a huge advocate for the Big Brothers Big Sisters program. When Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Minnesota began their Military Mentoring program, Ryan volunteered his time and expertise to speak on behalf of Big Brothers Big Sisters. The Military Mentoring program, Operation Bigs, supports children from military families and it encourages active duty, reserve, and retired military personnel to volunteer as mentors. Although Ryan has more responsibilities at home with his recent marriage, his move to the other side of town and at work, he strives to make sure he is consistently engaged with his Little Brother. They aim to coordinate activities every two weeks. “I always try to ensure he will have fun during our activities, but I did not expect that I would also enjoy myself as much as I do.”

Ryan has been a phenomenal role model and friend to Zach. The two hit if off from day one, but their friendship has continued to grow into something that has changed both of their lives, forever.

As a sophomore at the University of Georgia (UGA), Adam knew that he wanted to spend his time in college making a difference in his community. One day, he found the Big Brothers Big Sisters table at the UGA student center recruiting for Bigs.

Adam asked himself the same questions many Bigs ask themselves prior to signing up: “What do I know about being responsible for the growth of a child? Do I have the time each month to spend with the child?” Instead of focusing on hesitations, he focused on the profound opportunity he had to help a child. Adam then was matched with a Little Brother for the remainder of his time at UGA.

Shortly after graduation, Adam moved to Atlanta for his new job and knew he wanted to continue being a Big with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Metro Atlanta. Big Brother Adam was matched with second grader, AJ. Adam immediately noticed that his new Little Brother was shy and hesitant because of the absence of caring men in his life. Through much patience and dedication, AJ shared more with Adam. With help from AJ’s mother, Adam grew to understand AJ. “AJ’s education and achievements are very important to Adam. Big Adam has attended numerous basketball, football games, band concerts, and Boy Scouts events,” stated AJ’s mom. Adam has been there for AJ at every game or event that was important to AJ. They even have a tradition that on AJ’s birthday, Adam is in charge of bringing the cake.

Big Brother Adam has always kept AJ’s education and future in mind — helping AJ ace multiplication tests and teaching him the importance of continuing his education after high school. When AJ struggled academically or socially, Adam provided him with the tools necessary to succeed. By exposing AJ to activities that would encourage a sense of accomplishment, Adam has been instrumental in developing AJ’s confidence. Being a UGA graduate, Adam knew first-hand the importance of going to a university and has showed this to his Little Brother by making it a tradition to attend at least one Georgia Bulldogs football game every year. This tradition has shown AJ that with a little work, you can get places that will change your life for the better.

With all of AJ’s involvement and continued success, he has grown a talent for graphic design and is currently researching colleges, which Adam would love to see his Little Brother be a fellow Bulldog. “The relationship I have with my Little Brother AJ is one that will last forever and will continue to have an impact on both of us,” stated Big Brother Adam.