Posts

Big Sister Frances and Little Sister Deaja

Big Sister Frances and Little Sister Deaja

During their first encounter in September of 2012, Big Sister Frances and Little Sister DeaJa knew they were perfect for each other. Frances and DeaJa are also full of energy and love to talk. At first, DeaJa struggled with balancing her excitement with being considerate of others in the room. Frances helped her more positively channel that enthusiasm. “I am open to let DeaJa know what she says does matter but how she says it is more important,” stated Frances. DeaJa’s mother knew that her daughter needed someone with a strong character and tough skin who is able to knock down walls that even she as a mother could not. “She is the perfect fit for a young girl who has been through a life changing event,” said DeaJa’s mother.

With life changing events surrounding DeaJa’s life, Big Sister Frances understood that consistency in DeaJa’s life was important. Frances wanted to encourage DeaJa to channel her passion positively. Her goal as a Big Sister is to let her know that no matter what happens, she is there for her Little Sister. As a Big Sister and friend, Frances strives to make it to every event that DeaJa participates in school. DeaJa is passionate about poetry and writes it, reads it and has even been in competitions. This is another way in which Frances encourages DeaJa to let her personality shine by expressing her emotions and feelings with her poetry. Through this passion for poetry, Frances has learned more about being passionate in something you believe in and acting on it. They also enjoy walking and talking in the park, enjoying a meal, and shopping with the money DeaJa earned through her first summer job.

One of the main characteristics that Frances shares with her Little Sister is thoughtfulness for others. As they spend time together shopping, they will often reference someone that a particular item will be perfect for. DeaJa loves her family and is always thinking of ways to help them as she is gaining knowledge from her Big Sister. Frances knows the impact she is having on DeaJa’s life and will continue to be there for her no matter what and strive to help DeaJa succeed in life with all of her passion.

Big Sister Taylor and Little Sister Kelis

Big Sister Taylor and Little Sister Kelis

In October 2014, Big Sister Taylor first met her Little Sister, Kelis, during a site-based visit at Kelis’s school. Admittedly, Taylor described the first few months together as challenging. Just like with any relationship, the Big-Little match can take a little time to grow. Taylor recounted, “Our meeting time was during Kelis’s recess and I think she felt like she was missing out on playing with her friends. At the time she was struggling with reading, and that was one thing that I was going to help her with. She was not that excited about me being there and really did not want to sit down with a book.”

But soon, cooler weather hit and everything began to change. With recess moved indoors, Kelis began to enjoy their meetings more. Week by week and hour by hour, the two grew closer. Their weekly school visit was spent talking about school, reading together, and playing a game or making a craft. When the weather started to warm back up, Taylor said she was nervous. “We had finally grown really close and were enjoying each other’s company. Thankfully, Kelis was happy to spend that hour with me and her reading really improved.”

In addition to the site-based program allowing an opportunity to develop a closer friendship with Little Sister Kelis, Big Sister Taylor also found that their time together had a positive impact on Kelis’s academics. Kelis’s mother shared with Taylor that Kelis had recently advanced in her reading group at school. Taylor is looking forward to building on her relationship with Kelis by transitioning to the community-based program, which meets outside of school. “Due to our schedules, it was more convenient for us to switch to the community-based program after the school year is wrapped up. We are looking forward to spending time at the park, playing soccer, getting ice cream and just hanging out.” Taylor enjoys spending time with Kelis and has big hopes for her future. “I want Kelis to just be excited about life. Though our connection, I want to help guide her through her life.”

Big Brother Mike and Little Brother Dante

Big Brother Mike and Little Brother Dante

Little did Big Brother Mike know when met his six-year-old Little Brother Dante that he would have so much fun getting to know Dante and his family. Mike noticed that Dante was a very smart and mature child who had grown up quickly. When speaking with Dante’s mother, Mike learned that he had never had any positive, steady or consistent male role models in his life.. At this point, Mike stated, “I felt a big responsibility to be a good example and role model to him.” During their first outings, Big Brother Mike noticed how Little Brother Dante’s trust issues were evident, as at the end of the day Dante would want confirmation that he would see him again. However, Mike said, “Gradually, those issues faded away as I tried not to break plans and tried to remain consistent with our meetings and activities.”

The relationship is now 10-years strong and their bond couldn’t be greater. Through the years, Big Brother Mike and Little Brother Dante have enjoyed many activities such as hiking, skateboarding, going to the movies, playing video games and going to soccer games. Dante has developed a strong passion for soccer and is on a competitive team. Mike attends as many games as he can to support his Little Brother. Aside from being active, they have always been able to talk about anything. Little Brother Dante will ask his Big Brother for advice on issues or problems that arise so they can discuss solutions. “During the tough times, Mike gives me good advice to get through, whether it’s school or other matters,” stated Little Brother Dante.

Mike has always encouraged Dante to do well academically and to attend college. Even in times of pressure from those around him, Little Brother Dante has taken what his Big Brother has instilled in him to rise above any influences and strive to stay on the right track. He is currently an honors student and is starting to look into what his future holds for him in college. Dante’s mother couldn’t be more proud of the success her son has seen and will continue to see thanks to the guidance of Big Brother Mike.

Big Sister Deb and Little Sister Jenny

Big Sister Deb and Little Sister Jenny

Big Sister Deb became a Big for several reasons. The main reason was that it was an inherent dream to somehow affect this world we live in for the better, even if it was to make one person’s life, one animal’s life, or one family’s life a little better, a little easier. She always felt an obligation to give back to her community, as it was instilled in her by her dad to always give what and when you can. When Deb met her Little Sister, Jenny, she had just experienced a transition from living with her birth parents to staying with a foster family, then moving in her aunt in a span of one year. “I was emotional, confused and unquestionably difficult,” Little Sister Jenny stated.

Big Sister Deb took on her new Little Sister with excitement and was determined to make an impact on Jenny. When they first met, Little Sister Jenny was shy and quiet. Big Sister Deb encouraged her Little Sister to come out of her shell by teaching her to look people in the eye when people were speaking with her, to use manners, to hold her head up high and to say what she needed to say clearly. Deb’s open and honest personality would soon spill over to Jenny by making her aware that she is loved and valued by those around her.

In their eight years together, they have shared many adventures including baseball games, Blue Man Group concert, duck boat tours, visits to the aquarium and many delicious meals. Above all the adventures they have experienced, Little Sister Jenny understands that it’s more than the fun times they spend together, “it’s all the little lessons she has given me to store in my pocket and carry with me for the rest of my life.” Their long car drives are amongst their favorite time together, as that’s where they talk and laugh the most. Through this foundation of trust, Big Sister Deb has been there when her Little Sister has needed her.

The pressures of being a teenager are sometimes difficult for Little Sister Jenny to handle, but thanks to her Big Sister, she is able to look past this pressure. “I really don’t know what I’d do without her,” said Jenny. She now believes that she can lean on Deb through the best and worst of times. The feeling is mutual for her Big Sister. Deb describes her Little Sister as “my sunshine on a cloudy day.” Everyone around them knows that Wednesday is their day to spend time together. “I went into the program believing that I would be the one doing all the giving – not knowing how much I would receive in return. I know in my heart that Jenny and I will always be friends and she knows without a doubt that I will always be here. We don’t always see eye-to-eye, but we always see heart-to-heart.”

Big Brother Mittar and Little Brother Trinity

Big Brother Mittar and Little Brother Trinity

Little Brother Trinity lives with his grandmother, who saw a dire need for her grandson to have a positive role model and someone who could help bring stability to his life. Trinity had been through much hurt and disappointment in his life, and his grandmother wanted her grandson to rise above all the challenges he faced. In 2011, Trinity would be matched with his Big Brother Mittar. Having a clear understanding of the struggles that Trinity had already experienced, Big Brother Mittar listened to everything his Little Brother had to share without judgment, and helped him see the brighter side to a situation. As their match progressed, Big Brother Mittar made sure he was consistent in scheduling activities every couple of weeks and stayed in contact between the outings to ensure that Trinity knew he was still on his mind. Big Brother Mittar stated, “One of my initial long-term goals with Trinity was to redefine what he saw as possible in his life, career, lifestyle, relationships and social interactions.” Through this goal, he would instill his own personal experiences into much of what he taught his Little Brother.

Another area in which Big Brother Mittar put much emphasis on was Trinity’s academics. He made sure to take the time so he and Trinity could work on his literacy skills, while still making fun a priority by doing activities such as going to the zoo, playing in the park or visiting the batting cages. Mittar found ways to challenge Trinity’s reading skills by having him read signs, menus, and anything else he could while they were out in the community. All of their hard work paid off when Trinity was able to transition out of a special needs school and into his neighborhood middle school.

The influence that Big Brother Mittar has had on Trinity can be seen not only academically, but also socially and emotionally. Trinity admitted that before he met Mittar, he was prone to fighting and didn’t always trust adults in his life. Trinity now has the confidence necessary to make friends and he even started an anti-bullying campaign at his school. Little Brother Trinity has big aspirations and is interested in joining the Army. Mittar has used that goal as an opportunity to discuss the necessary steps that he must take in order to reach that dream, including doing well in school, training hard, and taking care of his body. Mittar finds ways to lead by example in their relationship and show his Little Brother what it’s like to live a happy, productive and successful life. “When I grow up, graduate, join the military and get married, I want Mittar to be there. He is my friend for life,” stated Little Brother Trinity.

Big Sister Leslie and Little Sister Dejanea

Big Sister Leslie and Little Sister Dejanea

Dejanea is a quiet girl who had limited exposure to life outside of her family, school and neighborhood. Her mother wanted for her daughter to have an opportunity to experience things she couldn’t give her. In June 2012, Little Sister Dejanea would be matched with her Big Sister, Leslie. From the very beginning of their match, Leslie saw how graceful her Little Sister was, regardless of any struggles her family might be going through. Leslie has been instrumental in giving Dejanea a break from any troubles at home. They have built their relationship by going to the movies, going shopping, attending princess camp, spending the afternoon at Joyland Amusement Park, and playing at an indoor ropes course called Adrenaline City.

Big Sister Leslie loves giving back to her community any way she can and has instilled this in her relationship with Little Sister Dejanea. Over the past three years they have volunteered at the American Cancer Society Lubbock Hope Lodge, where Dejanea grew close with one of the residents, Tori. Little Sister Dejanea would take dinners to Tori and loved hanging out with her. Sadly, Tori lost her battle to cancer in January 2014 and this was one of the biggest heartbreaks Little Sister Dejanea experienced. From this tragic event, Leslie and Dejanea started a tradition in Tori’s memory, where they take dinner to the residents at the Hope Lodge once a month. “Being together and giving back has helped us heal from the loss of Tori. I share this story because of the impact it has had on Dejanea and me. I think our relationship has grown stronger,” stated Big Sister Leslie. She also added, “From Tori, Dejanea has learned the importance of education and to never give up.”

Academics has been a very big part of their story. Big Sister Leslie has helped Little Sister Dejanea improve on her grades and is even now enrolled in some Advanced Placement classes, where she has excelled. Dejanea’s mother is very proud of her daughter and is appreciative to Big Sister Leslie in all of the support she has given to Dejanea. “My favorite thing about Leslie is that she is just all around concerned for Dejanea, from school to personal feelings.” Through all the struggles that Dejanea has experienced, she has embraced all of the life lessons and thanks her Big Sister for always being there. “She always treats me like the daughter she never had. That’s why I’m going to treat her like the friend I never had.”

Big Brother Eric and Little Brother Octavio

Big Brother Eric and Little Brother Octavio

As a seven-year-old, Little Brother Octavio had already experienced much adversity and went through the foster care system. His mom wanted to find someone who would be able to help Octavio overcome the struggles she saw in her son. Octavio was a very shy kid with a fair amount of anxiety over new and changing situations. He had little trust in those around him, and the fear of failure was impacting his ability learn new skills at school. Fortunately, things began to change once Little Brother Octavio met his new Big Brother, Eric, at the Pacific Science Center in 2013. After talking with Octavio, his mother and teachers, Big Brother Eric and Little Brother Octavio set forth three main goals. Their first goal was to complete the Children’s Marathon, where Octavio would have to run 25 miles prior to the event and then the last 1.2 miles at the event. The second and third goals included reading 10 books and to write one book together, as Octavio’s teachers mentioned these were two key areas of development.

They took all three goals as a challenge and focused on them both during and outside of their outings. Little Brother Octavio would work on running during recess, while Big Brother Eric would train first thing in the morning. During every meeting, Eric would work with Octavio on reading for at least 15 minutes. As a way to motivate his Little Brother with their third goal of writing a book, Eric suggested that Octavio sell his book for $1 to friends and family. After five months of working together, they finished their book, which was mostly composed of photos and descriptions of their outings together. Octavio worked on his comfort level and prepared a sales pitch, and it was here that Octavio developed a sense of confidence. “It was really a thrill to witness that ‘aha’ moment for him. ‘I did this!’ He was proud of himself that day,” stated Big Brother Eric.

Not only did they complete their goals, but they are now a big part of their routine. They have completed multiple marathons and written several books, including a fiction book called “Fox and Bird Become Friends.” Octavio’s mother stated, “Eric took Octavio as a treasure in his life without batting an eye and within a year, Octavio had made huge strides in becoming the happy, energetic, gregarious kid he was supposed to be.”

Big Sister Molly and Little Sister Hope

Big Sister Molly and Little Sister Hope

November 17, 2004, is a very special date for Big Sister Molly and Little Sister Hope. This is the date when they first met. Little Sister Hope, having just turned six, was a little ball of energy with a toothless smile and a bright spirit who was excited to meet her new Big Sister. Hope’s life was a cycle of poverty and instability with many moves and school changes, so her mom knew that her daughter needed someone to guide her and help bring stability.

Their match started with swimming, ice-skating and playing basketball, but the relationship has expanded far beyond these weekly activities. One of their favorite times together is when they visit Big Sister Molly’s family at their annual gathering in a small cottage. “Away from school and peers, surrounded instead with activities such as swimming, water-skiing and hiking, Hope transforms into her truest self. She shines,” stated Big Sister Molly.

Big Sister Molly has seen her Little Sister learn to read, write, tell time and ride a bike without training wheels. She has also attended Hope’s fifth-grade graduation, eighth-grade graduation and will soon see her graduate high school in 2017. School has always been a hard endeavor for Hope and with the help from her Big Sister, Hope has a new found passion for writing. Now instead of working on addition and subtraction, Big Sister Molly and Little Sister Hope are taking on issues relating to self-esteem, friendships, boys and the goal of one day becoming a writer.

“I’m thankful every day for Molly and the sacrifices she makes for me and my family. She does every possible thing to help me do well,” said Little Sister Hope. She sees her Big Sister as a real sister, mentor and friend who has inspired her to reach for the stars and to know that nothing is impossible. Her Big Sister stated, “Ten years after that first day, Hope is still a ball of energy with a bright spirit – she’s just a much taller ball of energy whose teeth finally grew in.”

Big Brother Paul and Little Brother Chris

Big Brother Paul and Little Brother Chris

Chris was your typical young boy, except he had already faced many challenges in his short life. After being adopted from Russia, Chris lost his father to cancer. Chris’ mom wanted to help her son cope with the recent loss of his dad. Little Brother Chris would be matched with Big Brother Paul in 2011 through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Southern Adirondacks in New York. Big Brother Paul knew shortly after retiring that he wanted to use his new found free time to volunteer in some way, and thought becoming a mentor would be a great way to give back.

Their initial match meeting happened just before Christmas 2011. Little Brother Chris was ecstatic to have a Big Brother and wanted to plan their first outing right away. They started building their relationship by going bowling, skating, golfing, watching movies and playing in arcades. Paul noticed how open his Little Brother was to him and made it a point to reciprocate the trust. Big Brother Paul stated, “He was always open and honest about his likes and dislikes, and with the help of his incredibly devoted mother, he was always ready on time and excited to get together.” The trust level kept increasing and Chris would call his Big Brother if he had a rough day at school and needed to vent or get advice.

Their activities went from being completely planned to simply coming up with a game plan when they met up, and would often change. Big Brother Paul and Little Brother Chris would often find themselves going on adventures exploring a park or lake they had never been to, or simply skipping stones in the river. During these adventures, Chris would talk about his dad and how much he missed him, but also mentioned to his Big Brother that the time with him sometimes felt like the time he would spend with his dad. “Bigs are in a special position of being able to offer friendship, guidance and support with no emotional baggage and no pressure – a true judgment-free zone,” stated Big Brother Paul.

Paul worked closely with his Little Brother in gaining confidence and understanding that success in life takes discipline and sacrifice. Little Brother Chris has been doing better in school and less prone to frustration and negative self-image. His ticks and anxious habits have decreased and he is better able to handle himself in public. Chris’ mother has been very grateful for Paul’s impact on her son. “We are so glad that Paul and his family are a big part of our life. Chris has grown up because of him.”

Big Sister Esther and Little Sister Donyae

Big Sister Esther and Little Sister Donyae

After graduating the program with her first Little, Big Sister Esther was looking to continue being a Big Sister and help another child. Esther was matched with Little Sister Donyae, who was a sweet, shy and polite eight-year-old. Little Sister Donyae’s mom saw a need for her daughter to be influenced by someone in the community and give her extra support as she grows up. She also wanted someone who would enjoy being a kid, support Donyae with her interests and talents, and above all, someone who would serve as a trusted friend. From the beginning of their relationship, Big Sister Esther was there for her Little Sister. The two also shared interests in reading, discount shopping, fashion and cheerleading. They reminded each other of the importance of fun, laughter and staying young.

Little Sister Donyae has a passion for the arts and her Big Sister has encouraged and supported her by attending many school plays, concerts and dances. This encouragement has led Little Sister Donyae to find the confidence to do many new things, such as try out for cheerleading and making the squad. Another great example of how Esther has encouraged her Little Sister was when she got glasses and refused to wear them after she got teased by her peers. Esther heard about this and on their next outing, she asked to see Donyae’s glasses. She immediately complimented on how cute they were and how it was a shame that she didn’t want to wear them. Her little sister then got the confidence to start wearing them, so Esther made it a point to compliment her Little on her new glasses in every outing.

As Esther and Donyae nurtured their relationship, car rides became a big part of that growth. “Our quiet car rides on the way to a destination with her sitting in the back have turned into true conversations “Big and Little” sisters have. We talk about friends, family, the ups and downs of life, being friends with the right people, death, wondering why some people say they love us, but never show it, and wondering why we can’t take the pain away and make everything better for those that love us and show us love,” stated Big Sister Esther. She is very proud of her Little Sister and the young lady she is becoming.

Donyae went through a few struggles early on, but her mom has been so grateful for Big Sister Esther in being there for Donyae. Donyae’s mother shared, “Esther has been very supportive and understanding when trying to help Donyae with her goals and struggles as a teenager.” Big Sister Esther’s constant support has certainly made an impact in Little Sister Donyae’s outlook in life and finding the strength to keep moving forward, no matter the struggles.